It takes practice to become comfortable moving with and through fear to fulfill your larger commitments.
Think of it the same way you might think about developing a skill in sports. You wouldn’t just go out and hit a home run the first time you’ve ever hit a baseball. You practice swinging. You practice how to hold a bat. You get out there and you go into the batting cage and do it again and again and again.
The same thing is true with practicing a new way of being around fear. To begin with, try it out somewhere small. Maybe it’s with telling your boss that you actually want to take that lunch hour, rather than work through it. Everybody else works through it. They don’t take that lunch hour, but maybe you really need it! You can practice moving through fear by having that conversation with your boss and saying, “I will perform better if I take this lunch hour. I need this time.” By taking the small step of having that conversation, you can expand your comfort zone around fear.
You practice swinging the bat.
Maybe the next time it’s a conversation about how you actually do need to take that vacation or long weekend at the end of the month. You spend time in the batting cage.
Practice having those conversations at a gradient. Start small and build from there, so that you get some facility with being in that place of fear and moving through it.
Game time: You step up to the plate.
As a coach, I help my clients take a step back and look at their larger commitments. There is no one path to get there, every situation is different, but together we can find a path of practice that strengthens your comfort levels around fear.
Over time, you’ll find that you’re actually doing the thing that triggers fear for you. The fear will always be there, but you will learn to move through it. You will take action because you said you would, and not because you are afraid of what will happen if you don’t. You will start to achieve the things that you say you want to achieve.
The pitcher winds up, and releases a fastball - right down the plate.
With practice, this way of being will become a part of you. That’s when it will feel like things are clicking and working. That’s when you start to feel happy every day. Tasks that once felt monumental will feel normal. You’ll actually build the business that you want to build, and take time off without feeling guilty. You’ll be able to spend time with your family on the weekends, without having your work phone on.
That’s when you can experience fulfillment and the sensation of being responsible for your path, rather than being a victim of it.
BANG: A home run!
Originally published on Linked-In